Sunday, November 16, 2008

In-Cher-Itance


Last night I watched Saturday Night Live and became better acquainted with Beyoncé, the musical guest. I’d certainly seen her splashed all over the pages of In Style, etc., listened to her sing on the Academy Awards as well as in Dreamgirls, but I really didn’t have a sense of her pop music après Destiny’s Child.

So there she was, singing her first number, delivering some strong vocals with some pounding dance moves, but I still can’t really speak to her music because I was so distracted: Was Beyoncé going to fall out of her dress?

She was wearing what looked to be a knit bodice that had a plunging neckline. And I don’t mean a deep “V”; I mean a deep rectangle. Of course double-sided tape was hard at work, but Beyoncé seemed to test its limits, as she’d slam from side to side to punctuate her song.

I *think* I liked her as a singer, but really, I’d get the girl a new dress.

For is there anyone out there who finds these deep rectangular necklines attractive? Sexy, bold, yes, but attractive? Just overly exposed, without a pleasing line, from my vantage point.

And truly, line is everything. When Liz Hurley debuted her poitrine in safety-pinned deep-V Versace, the long line worked. In contrast, when Jennifer Lopez wore her green voluminous, deeper-V Versace, she looked like she forgot to do up her buttons.

For singers who wish to look beautiful but daring, I suggest a return to the days of Cher and Bob Mackie. No matter how outrageous or tiny her dresses, Cher’s line was always beautiful (even in her scandalous Academy Award dress). And no amount of teasing can make up for a garment that simply doesn’t sit well on the body.

10 comments:

WendyB said...

I loved J. Lo's Versace! No one who came after her and tried to do that look did it right though.

K.Line said...

OMG Miss C. I was "chatting" with ENC throughout the show and I had this whole convo with her (she wasn't watching yet cuz she's in Cali) about how that dress didn't fit and all I could think was, Beyonce's tit is going to fall out on network TV!!!

K.Line said...

Not to mention the skirt of the dress did not fit either. It was a really unfortunate look - largely because it didn't fit. It was for a woman 1 to 2 dress sizes smaller.

Miss Cavendish said...

It's so true! Her too-small skirt kept riding up, her bodice kept separating . . . twas creeping into wardrobe malfunction territory. And then there was the irony of Justin Timberlake being present for another potentially titilating event . . . He must be a jinx . . .

Elizabeth said...

Agreed! I spent a bit of time explaining double-stick tape to 12 while we watched that number. We both thought the tape was working overtime. 12 asked "why wear the dress if you have to wear the tape?" Ah, young minds.

(I also think the vocals were dialed way down in the mix, so she was difficult to hear and appreciate.)

La Belette Rouge said...

I am so sorry I missed the show. Now I want to see the dress.

Songy said...

that dress would make me worry about all the fluffy bits. too much fluff I'm afraid. deep v neck isn't for everyone. j-lo killed it and no one will match for some time...

Couture Carrie said...

Cute post title!
A true style icon . . .

xoxox,
CC

Anonymous said...

I second La Bel. I generally find Beyonce to be charming, but she definitely pushes the dressing envelope. Throw in a few jerky dance moves and you're in a danger zone. Not sure we'll see a throwback to Cher style, but I see what you mean: You can be exposed without being EXPOSED.

Imelda Matt - The Despotic Queen of Shoes said...

I haven't seen this and it's most likely that I won't but thanks for sending me on an 1 and a half wonder through the net trawling for Cher images. I've unearthed some of the most heaven things...now the question is how do I craft them into a post?